Kyle Van Noy announces return to Patriots with perfect tweet

MIAMI, FL - DECEMBER 09: Frank Gore #21 of the Miami Dolphins rushes and avoids the tackle of Kyle Van Noy #53 of the New England Patriots during the second half at Hard Rock Stadium on December 9, 2018 in Miami, Florida. (Photo by Michael Reaves/Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - DECEMBER 09: Frank Gore #21 of the Miami Dolphins rushes and avoids the tackle of Kyle Van Noy #53 of the New England Patriots during the second half at Hard Rock Stadium on December 9, 2018 in Miami, Florida. (Photo by Michael Reaves/Getty Images) /
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I’m sorry … why did the Miami Dolphins even pretend to invest in Kyle Van Noy?! Just one year later into his four-year deal (?!), KVN is walking back to the Patriots after experiencing Brian Flores as a head coach.

We don’t understand … any piece of this.

Was it all a ruse? Was Van Noy’s rude trolling of his former organization after their mid-December affair just a way of forcing himself out of Miami’s culture?

Was he waiting for New England to splurge on weapons before somehow conning the ‘Phins into sacrificing him as a cap casualty?

We have no idea, but the second Miami let him loose it seemed like he’d somehow find his way back to New England, and the leader of the Boogie Men made the reunion official on Wednesday night.

And yes, he scooped it himself.

And meanwhile the Dolphins have … former Patriot Adam Butler? Great?

The Patriots have added Kyle Van Noy again from the Dolphins.

Yes, Van Noy himself captained the announcement of this re-signing — and why wouldn’t he, after all the Patriots meant to him in his rejuvenation process?

Bill Belichick picked him up off the scrap heap and turned him into a defensive leader and de facto captain of the unit. It was only natural that he’d want to return for the good times the very second the team was on the come up again.

The details of his departure from Miami? Eternally hazy. The benefit to New England? His return, along with the rest of the defensive opt outs, could make this an above-average unit again very quickly.

The ongoing arms race to sign former Patriots should slow quite a bit in the years to come, if it hasn’t already skidded to a halt.

They’re never as good in their next city. And they usually find their way back home anyway, so why bother?

Welcome home, KVN. Let’s start a new era together.