Patriots special teams coordinator sounds like an absolute lunatic

FOXBOROUGH, MASSACHUSETTS - NOVEMBER 29: Head coach Bill Belichick of the New England Patriots looks on during the game against the Arizona Cardinals at Gillette Stadium on November 29, 2020 in Foxborough, Massachusetts. (Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images)
FOXBOROUGH, MASSACHUSETTS - NOVEMBER 29: Head coach Bill Belichick of the New England Patriots looks on during the game against the Arizona Cardinals at Gillette Stadium on November 29, 2020 in Foxborough, Massachusetts. (Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images) /
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You wouldn’t believe what this Patriots assistant drinks every day.

If you’re working for Bill Belichick, you’re probably an eccentric individual who doesn’t get much sleep. After all, the New England Patriots head coach breathes football, so if you’re on his staff you’re either inheriting that mentality or getting chewed up rather quickly.

Take, for example, special teams coordinator Cam Achord, who stepped in for Joe Judge after he left to take the head coaching job for the New York Giants. You know the Pats couldn’t afford to miss a beat on special teams, which is an area they’ve been particularly astute in for the past 20 years.

So you’d have to think Achord was aware of the stakes after getting his promotion. Well, sleep and nutrition be damned, because it’s FOOTBALL TIME BABY!

Achord told reporters that he ingests an unthinkable amount of caffeine on a daily basis and now we can see why his ascension to the NFL has been so notable. The man got a job with the Patriots after spending two years with Southwest Mississippi Community College as the football team’s offensive coordinator, special teams coordinator, quarterbacks/running backs/tight ends coach, and receiving coordinator. Ten caffeinated drinks were probably required before noon in order to hold down all those responsibilities.

This is now his third year in New England and his contributions have been jumping out at us. On top of helping the special teams unit block a franchise record four punts last year, that very facet of the game has kept the Patriots afloat in 2020. If they don’t get standout performances by ST against the Cardinals and Chargers, we could be looking at a much more dismal campaign.

On top of that, punter Jake Bailey and kicker Nick Folk have saved the Patriots on numerous occasions. While that doesn’t have everything to do with Achord, there’s no doubt his presence has played a role.

As for former 2020 fifth-round pick Justin Rohrwasser, well, perhaps he made the wrong impression when Achord was either insanely jacked up or completely deprived of caffeine. Honestly, it could’ve been either one.

We need to see a halftime or postgame speech from this guy, so let’s get the hot mics rolling ASAP.