The Colts Suck: A Game Preview For The Patriots


I have been running this blog for quite some time, and while my Patriots fandom surely gets in the way at times, I feel like I generally keep things objective in my analysis of the team, and of the NFL. However this week that is off the table, because it is Colts week, and it will be along time before I forgive them for what they tried to do to Tom Brady.

So with that in mind, here is a quick Wednesday game preview of Patriots-Colts:

Everything About The Colts Is Pathetic

It must be pretty embarrassing for the so called “analysts” that picked the Colts to go to the Super Bowl this season, because through five games, Indy looks pathetic in all phases of the game. The offensive line can’t block, running backs can’t hold onto the ball, receivers can’t get open, Andrew Luck keeps turning the ball over, the defensive line and linebackers can’t stop the run, and aside from Vontae Davis, the secondary really can’t cover anyone that has an ounce of talent in this league.

Thus far, the Colts have gotten blown out by the Bills and Jets, and luckily beaten the Jaguars, Titans, and Texans. With the exception of the Jets, whose defense is legit, all of those teams completely suck, and if the Colts were a halfway decent team, they would have blown out every single one of those clubs. Instead, they struggled against all of them, and were pretty damn lucky to come away with a victory.

The Colts rank 23rd in total offense, 24th in scoring offense, 24th in rushing offense, 28th in total defense, 19th in rush defense, and 28th in pass defense. Those numbers are the definition of mediocrity, and they will get absolutely destroyed by Tom Brady this Sunday in primetime.

New England is without a doubt the best team in the league this year, and they are going to have a field day against the Colts this week. Tom Brady and his offense will rip apart Indy’s defense, whether it is through the air with Rob Gronkowski and Julian Edelman, or on the ground with LeGarrette Blount and Dion Lewis. The Colts’ front seven is pathetic once again, and the Patriots can bully them right out of their own stadium if they want to.

On the other side of the ball, I don’t care if Andrew Luck is playing or not, the Patriots’ front seven will completely dominate the Colts’ offensive line, and that is where Indy’s chances on offense go to die. If Luck plays, there will probably be a few more explosive plays down the field, but there will also be more turnovers. If Matthew Hasslebeck plays, this game could be over by the midpoint of the first quarter.