Best picks to replace the entire Patriots coaching staff in 2024

It’ll be interesting to see how Robert Kraft approaches replacing Bill Belichick. Firing him seems like an odd decision in the first place, given it’s less than a year since the team extended his contract, but here we are. 

Rumor has it Jerod Mayo will step right in and take over, but that seems like an odd decision, too. Both scenarios appear to pose more questions than they answer.

The first question is, will Kraft be the one to appoint a new head coach?

The Patriots will need a new GM too if Belichick departs, and finding successful GMs is a tricky business. The truly successful ones already have jobs. Or will Kraft decide he can be the new Jerry Jones and become the GM himself? Kraft usually shies away from the spotlight, though, unlike Jerry, but who knows? 

After 23 years of a head coach with a defensive lean (although Belichick is arguably the most knowledgeable coach in the league regarding both sides of the ball), it seems like a good time to go the other way.  

Dream head coach candidate #1: Bobby Slowik

If the Patriots want to make a big splash, they could follow the Rams' lead and hire a young offensive Wizkid. Bobby Slowik would fit that bill perfectly; he’s been working with CJ Stroud on the “surprising” Texans offense this year, which has only turned the ball over 11 times this season, the fewest turnovers in the league.

Even better than that, they’ve only thrown five interceptions, leading the league in that category as well. 

But that’s a bit of a stretch; it seems unlikely the Patriots will want to have a rookie head coach to go with their rookie quarterback. A few candidates fit the “safe pair of hands” mold, but they wouldn’t inspire the fan base much.

Gary Kubiak and Frank Reich are both old dudes but have also won Super Bowls. And they both know former QBs who you assume Kraft would feel comfortable handing the reins to.  

Dream head coach candidate #2: Eric Bienemy

If they’re looking for Super Bowl winners who should be head coaches in the NFL, Eric Bienemy has two rings. And if you’ve watched the Chiefs' offense since he left, you know he strongly influenced Patrick Mahomes, even if they didn’t always see eye to eye.  

Bienemy is behind the Commanders' offense this season, and while Sam Howell isn’t exactly Patrick Mahomes, there’s no arguing that he isn't an exciting quarterback, and the Patriots definitely need that. 

Dream assistant head coach and offensive coordinator: Dave Canales

Dave Canales has to be the assistant head coach and offensive coordinator, too. In 2022, he coached Geno Smith to the best season of his career, prompting him to win “Comeback Player of the Year.” However, how you can come back to something that you’d never done before is a different discussion.

This year, Canales has been the offensive coordinator in Tampa Bay, where he’s got Baker Mayfield on course to throw more touchdowns than he has in his career. The quarterback is also just 0.8% away from the best completion rate of his career, with four games still left to play. 

Canales has worked as an assistant strength coach, a tight ends coach, and a wide receiver coach. All at different levels of the football tree. And even though he’s just 42, he has been a coach for 19 years! 

Dream defensive coordinator: Rob Ryan

An experienced defensive coordinator would be helpful to add some balance to the new pair on the offensive side. And who’s more experienced (and fun) than Rob Ryan? He’s been a defensive coordinator before, too, five times, in fact! He’s got Patriots experience, too; he was a linebackers coach between 2000 and 2003. So, he was around for two Super Bowl wins.  

Ryan is currently a “senior advisor” at the Raiders, who could be having their own shakeup; he might be available if he fancies stepping back into the ring. 

Dream special teams coach: Matthew Slater

Special teams coaches are interesting; people rarely hear about them unless something spectacular happens. Something spectacularly good or spectacularly bad. But the Patriots have their own special teams guru in Matthew Slater.  

It would be a bit of a jump to go from playing to coordinating, but Slater has worked with many different coaches and coordinators in his 16-year career. It’s not like he’s got anything left to learn. The man is a 10-time Pro Bowler and three-time Super Bowl champion. He knows more than most special teams coordinators will ever will. 

A team deciding to end a dynasty in any sport is always a gamble. They usually come to a natural conclusion when the coach decides to retire. Duke men's basketball hasn’t been the same since Coach K stepped away, and Manchester United has been disastrous since Sir Alex Ferguson left.

If Robert Kraft is confident this will improve the team, he’d better ensure he finds the perfect replacement. 

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